To My Unrelenting Spouse Who Has Been Exiled To The Basement

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

At some point during these past few months, as we bickered through the lips of our lawyers and divided between us the things that don’t actually matter (like that four-foot ceramic gargoyle in the upstairs bathroom and that repulsive painting depicting topless clowns you insisted hang in the hall), you’ve hidden something very precious to me.